I think today begins the start of a new phase of this saga. Karen was moved down to the regular recovery rooms and is now out of the ICU. Her current status is truly amazing. Less than 24 hours after brain surgery the doctors have told us she can go home tomorrow if she feels up to it. That is certainly a far cry from our original fears that she would not even be able to talk.

She essentially has no negative results from the surgery itself. That in itself is an answer to prayer that we are happy to receive.

As we begin this new chapter I think we're moving from some of the more acute challenges to the longer term challenge. We'll be meeting shortly with the oncologist and will begin the longer process of fighting the cancer that is still in her.

As I try to comprehend what this means and what it will look like as we move forward, I am confronted with at least one huge reality ... I am not in control ... and neither is Karen. This is a really hard concept to grasp for both of us. The whole idea that we have to rely on other people for help is not easy for either of us to acknowledge.

Everyone hopes that if a tragedy like this one strikes they will have the kind of support that we have experienced the last four days. But it isn't until the offers of assistance begin pouring in that you realize how odd it is to actually be on the receiving side of compassion. People like us do not like to admit that we need help. If I'm being honest I'd have to say that it is much more comfortable to be on the other end. When you are the one that is giving you feel a sense of control over the situation. In our current situation we are being offered help because we truly couldn't do this on our own. It's downright humbling.

I can't help but draw a comparison in my mind between this situation and the Christian message. After all, fundamental to the message of Christianity is the reality that we are all dead in our sin. We are all separated from a loving relationship with our Creator because our sin creates that insurmountrable rift between us and a holy God. We all have a fundamental need to be reconciled to the God who created us and sustains each and every molecule of our being. In short, we desperately need help.

And like our situation with Karen's cancer, the answer is not in trying to conjure up the strength you need by looking into the recesses of your own heart. But by God's grace we get to a point where we realize that we need to rest in someone else's efforts. We need to rely on the strength that comes from God's heart as that was historically expressed in him sending his only Son to die on the cross for the sins of his people.

What a humbling thing to realize how truly weak that we are. And then to remember what our Heavenly father tells us,

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.

I thank Him for showing me my weakness. I thank him that I now have no choice but to trust in his strength and to remember that his hands are much much bigger than mine.